{life} We need a resolution

{Blog post title} the name of a song I still really like by the late Aaliyah. It’s on my iPod in the car, I know all the words, I howl it badly at least once a week. Released when I was a clueless, anxious 14 year old and still appreciated now I am a clueless, anxious 30 year old.

(This information has zero relevance to the post; I was going to title it no resolutions, but the song popped into my head)

2015 was a challenging year for me personally, I was questioning myself often, wondering why everyone had their shit together. (By everyone I refer to those who I happened to take note of)

Why couldn’t mine be together?? It just spread everywhere and I couldn’t collect it into a neat pile. (I didn’t even intend that pun)

Now, there’s no big reveal, it’s still not together and some days I can acknowledge that with little thought and get on with whatever the day holds. Sometimes though, sometimes quite often last week year I would overthink, panic, put on the self deprecating facade that seems to pass off as confidence and in my opinion, waste time. I was/still am wasteful of time. I know that by worrying about inevitable situations or events that I am wasting time, I know that overthinking is pointless. I’m not daft. But can I stop myself? Nope.

Anyway, getting to the point- I haven’t made any resolutions, I just know that for the last 3-6 months I have been lacking enjoyment from a couple of key aspects of life. I know I am lucky in many ways, I’m aware there are people worse off than me, I’m not ungrateful, I’m simply acknowledging.

No ‘new year, new me’-Just utilising my time.

To live with consciousness. To live with thought and awareness, if that makes sense ?! and to put a positive spin on my quirks.

I’m attempting to divert my restless energies that see me re-organising my cupboards into projects and other things. I’ve chosen to do Project 365 (also known as Project Life 365, My 365 etc) and also the 52 Lists Project.

My 365 which I started on New Years Day will be a photograph a day, with my camera and not my phone; I expect it will keep me active and help me to view my day to day surroundings differently? I don’t know yet as it’s only day 6. My 365 will be featured on my Instagram and I will summarise here once a month.

The #52ListsProject by Moorea Seal in all honesty I decided on yesterday. I was inspired by this photo on Cerys’ Instagram page and also read her blog post about it.

Photo 06-01-2016, 15 44 50
© Mascara & Mud

If you haven’t followed Mascara & Mud already please do so here, you won’t regret it.

My friend Beth has advised me to write lists on several occasions, she writes them all the time and her **** is firmly together. Plus, when I was  living my very cool rock and roll younger years I loved nothing more than listing trivial things like:

  • My favourite songs
  • My top 10 favourite celebrities
  • My favourite films
  • My favourite food

And so on.

My book won’t arrive for a couple of weeks, turns out it’s hugely popular. Thanks to Cerys I can keep to my decided schedule and start with the first week of 2016, she has kindly sent me photographs of the first 3 weeks which I will jot down and transfer over when it arrives.

I didn’t expect this post to be so long, if you’ve got to here you’ve helped me not be wasteful of my time!

2016 is all the rage right now.

T xx

 

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